Friday, May 4, 2012

Celebrating Difference

One evening not so long ago, I am sitting with two good friends who are praying for me. I hadn't mentioned to them my wrestling with Matt being different as described in my previous post. The one shares with me that she feels God has put it on her heart to tell me to celebrate Matt's differences, to dare to be different and see all the positive things that his differences are bringing to our lives.
It was a very spiritual moment, I just knew God was speaking to me through her, although I was rather surprised at the message. At first I fought with God - how can he expect me to embrace the differences I see in Matt. Over the days that followed I reflected on this invitation to celebrate Matt's differences.

Throughout Matt's life we have been doing a lot of celebrating. Every tiny step forward has been received with joy and party. Yet I realised that what we had been celebrating was not the ways that Matt is different, rather the small steps he was taking to become less different. We had been rejoicing in every achievement that would make him fit in and be the same. I am not saying that celebrating milestones reached is a bad thing, on the contrary, that is what got us through these last 5 years. But the invitation here is to celebrate more than just the victories, to celebrate all of Matt. And to celebrate the experiences, people and things that Matt's differences bring into our lives.

This is a huge change in perspective for me. I am still getting used to looking through this new set of glasses. These days, as I am standing in Matt's classroom about to kiss him goodbye, I sense the Holy Spirit nudging me to look around me with my new eyes. I am being trained to focus on all they ways in which Matt's differences are bringing something valuable to the other kids and his teacher.

What I am seeing with these new eyes is very healing.


Cindy said...

I can't believe I'm just catching up on your blog. Thanks so much for sharing this. I agree that our celebrations are all about the ways our kids become more normal instead of celebrating how they're different. It is definitely an eye-opening proposition...something I need to think about!

Pradeep Koonath said...

It is a wonderful life you are leading. Celebrate each moment of life together with Matt and all the people arround you.

Myself, I have an old mother having demensia and we all are enjoying the time with her. taking everything as normal.